


Sometimes a Lie is the Best Thing

by pterawaters



Series: Sometimes a Lie [1]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Family, Family Reunions, Fluff, Multi, Triad Verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-14
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-04-26 09:30:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4999603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pterawaters/pseuds/pterawaters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny tells a simple little lie to his mother, because she's 5000 miles away and it's easier than putting up with the entire Williams family trying to dictate his love life. Unfortunately, the lie involves his best friends, Steve and Catherine. The lie doesn't become a problem until the Williams family decides Hawaii would be the best place for a family reunion, and they're expecting to meet the people Danny insists he's been dating.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This work was written for the [Triad Verse Big Bang](http://triadversebang.tumblr.com/). You can read more about Triad Verse [here](http://triadverse.tumblr.com/post/86154454124/triad-verse-faq).
> 
> This work was beta read by a few people, including deerie, thewildestcucumber, and phantomavenger. Thanks so much, you guys!
> 
> The incredible artwork was done by Narya/ucanhavemysoup. Please visit her [art masterpost](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4997188) and let her know what you thought of the art.
> 
> The story title comes from the song "Telling Stories" by Tracy Chapman.
> 
> This story is roughly set in season 3, though it is a Triad Verse AU, and everything that goes along with it being an AU. I hope you enjoy!

Danny sits at the picnic table, chewing on his thumbnail, his leg bouncing, making the straw in his drink sway back and forth as he rocks the table. His shrimp plate lays untouched in front of him, not so much going cold as going lukewarm, because the sun is bearing down unrelenting, making Danny wish he could wear sunglasses without risking bodily harm from loss of peripheral vision. 

“They still not here, brah?” Kamekona asks, sitting down on the other side of the picnic table, the addition of his weight making Danny’s straw shudder wildly.

Giving Kamekona half a smile, Danny shakes his head. “They’re only five minutes late. I got here early.”

“Jersey time,” Kamekona says with a knowing nod. “You gotta chill out. You’re gonna have a heart attack, drive off all my customers.”

Danny scoffs. “If I have a heart attack, it’ll be because of the insane amount of butter you use on your garlic shrimp.”

“But what a way to go, right?”

A laugh escapes Danny without his consent, so he nods. “Yeah.”

Kamekona gestures to Danny’s plate. “Why you not eating, then?” He sweeps his hand around and adds, “People are gonna think it’s no good.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Danny says, even though he knows it’s not going to work. 

Reaching across the table, Kamekona picks a shrimp from the top of the pile on Danny’s plate, using his _bare hand_. He sticks it in his mouth and starts chewing with an exaggerated, “Mmmm!”

Danny pushes the plate across the table with a frown. “Here. It’s yours now. I’m not hungry.”

Kamekona shrugs and takes the plate, but he watches Danny with a frown as he starts to tuck in. After a minute, Kamekona says, “I’ve been told I’m a good listener, brah.”

“I am sure that, uh,” Danny says as he scratches at a spot on the table, “is the case, but unless you’ve got any good tips for getting big favors out of people after you’ve been caught in a lie, I’m afraid you can’t help me.”

There’s a silent moment, during Kamekona must ponder the situation, and then he’s pointing a shrimp at Danny and saying, “You know, I find cold, hard cash usually works.”

“Yeah, well.” Danny sighs. “I’m not sure anyone in the world has the sort of cold hard cash this favor’s going to take.”

“What? You need to kill a guy?” Coming out of Kamekona’s mouth, it almost seems like a request people actually make, on a frequent basis.

“No, I don’t need to kill a guy!” Danny huffs and runs his hand back over his hair. Before he can say more, he sees Steve and Catherine heading toward him from the parking lot. “They’re here.”

As Kamekona stands, taking Danny’s shrimp with him, he says, “Remember, cold hard cash.”

“Would you go away?” Danny knows he’s being snippy, but he can’t help it. Danny’s future ability to speak to his family hinges on how well this conversation with Steve and Catherine goes.

Catherine’s half a step ahead of Steve when they get to Danny’s table, bending down to give Danny half a hug and a peck on the cheek. “Hi, Danny.”

“Cath,” Danny says as he returns the embrace. “Steve.”

Steve passes behind Danny, clapping Danny on the shoulder as he goes, and then he rounds the table, sitting opposite Danny. Catherine joins him and Steve says, “Hey, Danny. So, what’s this all about?”

Danny chuckles nervously, clutching his hands together in his lap. “This is about the sticky situation I find myself in, concerning my, uh, my family.”

“Your family?” Catherine asks with a concerned frown, reaching across the table like she’d take Danny’s hand if he let her. 

Steve’s eyebrows are doing that concerned tilt of theirs as he asks, “What’s going on, Danny? Is somebody sick?”

“Not that I know of,” Danny replies, looking down at the table for a moment and taking a deep breath. As he looks up, he addresses Steve, “You know how I told you about my grandmothers, and how they decided this year’s family reunion should be here in Hawaii?”

“Yeah.” Steve nods and turns to Catherine, telling her, “It’s Danny’s Grandmothers’, what? Eighty-fifth birthday?”

“Eighty-fourth and Eighty-fifth,” Danny corrects him. “Nana Betty is turning eighty-five, but Nana Beatrice is a year younger. They decided they wanted to see Hawaii before they die, which isn’t going to be anytime soon if force of will is anything to go by.”

“So, what’s the sticky situation?” Catherine asks. “Do you need more places for your family members to stay?”

“No,” Danny insists, shaking his head. “They rented out a block of rooms at the Hilton. The situation–” Danny sighs, scratching the back of his neck. Better to just get it out, right? Like ripping off a band-aid. “The situation is a lie I told my mother, and then she repeated the lie to everyone else in the family and now I can’t take it back without looking like a boob, and I don’t know what to do.”

Catherine blinks at Danny a few times, her face blank. Steve cocks his head slightly to the left and asks, "What was the lie?"

Danny groans and lets his head fall down into his hands. 

"And how can we help?" Catherine asks, giving Steve a look.

Danny still has his face in his hands when he admits, "I told them I was dating you guys."

"What?" Catherine asks, sounding genuinely confused, and Danny's pretty sure he hears Steve gasp. Catherine asks Steve, "What did he say?"

Instead of answering her, Steve cackles as he asks Danny, "Just how long have you and Catherine and I been dating, exactly?"

"No!" Catherine cries, at once scandalized and amused. 

Danny hasn't been able to look up this whole time and when he does gather the courage to hazard a glance, he sees both Steve and Cath laughing at him. 

"Stop it!" Danny cries, perfectly aware of how much he sounds like a disgruntled eight-year-old. "It's not funny! I'm totally fucked!"

That just sets them off again, Catherine laughing so hard she snorts and Steve draping himself over Catherine, like he needs her help staying upright.

"Fine," Danny says, knocking his knuckles against the table once as he stands up. "If you're just going to laugh at me, nevermind."

Danny starts walking away, and he gets halfway to his car before Steve catches up.

"C'mon, Danny. I'm sorry," he says, lips still turned up in a broad smile, but at least he's not laughing anymore. "Just tell me, why did you feel you had to lie to your mother?"

Danny catches sight of Catherine, standing near the picnic table hesitantly, like she's not quite sure she's welcome in Danny and Steve's conversation. Danny sighs and tells Steve, "Ever since the divorce, and moving out here, I've been like this weird black sheep of the family. Like they think I decided to leave Stan and Rachel, rather than them kicking me out because I didn't fit their 'lifestyle' anymore." Danny scoffs and sticks his hands in his pants pockets. 

"And then Gabby left to Morocco," Danny continues, taking one hand out of his pocket to gesture with. "And then _everyone_ started trying to help me find a primer couple. My mother, my aunts. My goddamn sister even set up an online dating profile and kept giving out my phone number to all sorts of people. Do you know how many inappropriate pictures I had to delete before Grace could see them? I just wanted it to stop!"

Steve's smile has fallen into a concerned frown. He puts a hand on Danny's shoulder and says, "Yeah, no. I get it, Danny. Your family was way out of line."

"They meant well," Danny assures Steve. He gestures back toward Catherine. "C'mon. Now that you two are done laughing at my expense, I've got a favor to ask."

Back at the picnic table, Danny sits down across from Catherine, and he's surprised when Steve sits next to him instead of next to Catherine. Clearing his throat, Danny says, "With all my relatives coming into town two weeks from now, and my last actual partner, much less a third, long gone to Colorado, I think you can see my dilemma." He winces. "I need you guys to pretend to be my date friends."

"I figured that's where you were headed with this," Steve says, looking past the shrimp truck and out at the water.

Catherine taps her finger against her chin. "Why not? It's only for a week, right?"

"Y-yeah," Danny says, nodding quickly. He would not have thought Catherine would agree so easily, but she's got this spark in her eye like she thinks it's going to be fun. "It's just a week. Not forever." He laughs nervously.

Her voice confident, Catherine asks, "Steve?"

"You'll owe us," Steve says, but he's wearing a grin that says he doesn't mean it. In fact, he scoots closer to Danny, puts his arm around Danny's shoulders, and says, "Sweetheart."

Danny groans, shrugging off Steve's arm and ignoring the way Danny's shoulders feel almost cold in the instant after Steve backs off. He looks over at Steve, squinting in the bright Oahu sun, and says, "I'm never going to live this down, am I?"

Steve looks across the table at Catherine and grins. "Never?"

"Never," Cath says with a knowing grin. "Never, ever Danno." Laying both hands on the table and spreading out her fingers, Catherine leans forward. "Now, we're going to have to get our stories straight. How did we start dating? What dates have we been on? What are some important details we would know about you if we were dating?"

Danny squirms under Catherine's scrutiny. "That my family would pick up on?"

Before Catherine can answer, Steve asks, "What's the plan for dealing with Gracie? Are we supposed to lie to her, too?"

Danny's confused over how bothered Steve is by the prospect of lying to Grace. He says, "No, uh. No. I'll tell her what's really going on. She'll be in on it."

"Then we've got to get our stories straight with her, too," Catherine says, as serious as if she's planning out a mission. "When do you have Gracie next?"

"All this week," Danny says, grabbing Steve's arm and looking at the time on Steve's watch. "In fact, I have less than an hour to go pick her up from Rachel. Rachel, Stan, and Andrea are taking the boy to Germany, to meet Andrea's parents."

"Oh?" Catherine asks. "How old is he now?"

Danny wishes he knew nothing about the kid Stan and Rachel had with Andrea ("Pronounced ahn-DREY-ah, Danny!") after divorcing him, but unfortunately Grace is practically obsessed with her little brother. Danny sighs. "Charlie is two. Looks exactly like Andrea. He likes trucks, apparently."

Steve squeezes Danny's shoulder and gives Danny this look that Danny has categorized as Steve's "brothers in arms" look. Danny's not sure how to feel about Steve's solidarity, seeing as Steve's barely ever been part of a primer couple, much less been married and divorced. Still, Danny recognizes Steve trying his best to be a good friend, and Danny appreciates that. Danny gives Steve a nod of acknowledgement. 

Turning back to Catherine, Danny says, "Grace has homework tonight, but maybe tomorrow night you guys could come over for dinner and cahoots?"

"It's a date," Steve says as he stands. Leaning down again he murmurs, "babe," and kisses Danny's cheek with a wet smack. 

Catherine's peal of laughter rings throughout the picnic area next to Kamekona's shrimp truck, and a moment later, Danny's sitting alone, wondering what just happened and rubbing his cheek. 

At least Danny's friends agreed to help him. This is going to be great. The Williams clan will get off Danny's back about dating someone while they're in arm's length, and once they head back to Jersey, Danny can tell them it didn't work out. The fallout from that "break up" will be much easier to handle without the threat of being hit upside the head. Repeatedly. 

~*~

"Hey, Grace," Danny says, pausing at her open bedroom door and giving it a perfunctory knock. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

Grace looks up from her computer, sitting up on her bed, and smiles. "Sure, Danno. What's going on?"

Danny's practiced this speech in his head about half a dozen times, but the words still don't sound right. He clears his throat and sits at the foot of her bed. "Uh, you know how it's never a good idea to lie, right?"

Grace's eyes go wide and almost immediately, she says, "I didn't mean to! I was just really hungry and Andrea's granola bars were right there and I forgot I'm not supposed to eat them!"

"What?" Danny says with a half-amused chuckle. He shakes his head, "No. I don't care about that, baby. If you're hungry, you should eat."

"Andrea says that's how you get fat," Grace says with a frown, her gaze on her hands in her lap.

"Then you get fat," Danny says with a shrug. Honestly, he feels like he could go over to the Edwards house and start wringing necks, but that's not going to do any good. Instead, Danny has to be the dissenting voice in Grace's otherwise Stepford upbringing. "There's nothing wrong with being whatever size you're supposed to be. I mean, look at Kamekona. He's huge, but everyone loves him, right?"

Grace nods, a hint of a smile on her face. 

"And I'm not the tallest guy on the planet." Danny presses his hand to his chest. "But I don't worry about it, because people are all different sizes and shapes, okay?"

"So I can eat more of Andrea's granola bars?" Grace asks with a bright smile.

"Maybe not _her_ food." Danny sighs and leans forward, squeezing Grace's shoulder. "You're still growing, baby. If you're not getting enough to eat over with your other parents, you let me know, okay?"

"Okay," Grace says with a quick nod. "Is that all you wanted to talk about?"

"No," Danny says, taking his hand back and using it to scratch the bridge of his nose. "I, uh, I told a lie to my mother, just to make her happy, and now I need help keeping up pretenses."

"I don't know what that means," Grace tells Danny. "How come you're allowed to lie to Grandma, and I'm not allowed to lie to Mom?"

Danny chuckles. "That is a very good point, sweetheart. But you know how sometimes we tell the people we love nice lies? White lies? Like, 'Oh, your hair looks fantastic today!' Or, 'Of course you look good wearing orange.' Just to make them feel better."

"What did you tell Grandma?" Grace asks, a very unimpressed look on her face. 

Danny winces and admits, "I told her I'm dating Steve and Catherine."

"Oh! That!" Grace rolls her eyes. "Why are we talking about lies, then?"

Danny gapes like a fish out of water. "Because I'm _not_ actually dating Steve and Catherine," he cries, throwing his hands in the air.

Grace accents her unimpressed look with one raised eyebrow. Danny didn't even know she could do that. 

"I'm not!" Danny insists, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning at his daughter. "Why are you giving me that look?"

Grace mimics Danny's posture, crossing her arms as well. "You and Catherine are always over at Uncle Steve's house. The three of you. Together."

"Steve's got the big TV! We watch football!" Now that he thinks about it, Danny does end up hanging out with Steve and Catherine a lot. He used to think of it as hanging out with his friend Steve and Steve's girlfriend, Catherine, but now Catherine's one of Danny's friends too, so it's not the same anymore. And of course Danny knows what people say about groups of three who spend a lot of time together. No wonder Grace is confused. "Look, just for during the family reunion, we're all going to pretend that Daddy is dating Catherine and Uncle Steve, okay?"

Her eyebrows high on her forehead, Grace nods. "Yeah, okay, Danno." There's a tinge of sarcasm in Grace's voice and Danny can't tell if he's annoyed or proud. 

"Okay. And, uh, listen," Danny says, making sure Grace meets his eyes before he continues. "If you're not comfortable with this, we don't have to do it. Just tell me now, and I'll figure something else out."

"Don't worry about it," Grace says, holding out her fist. "I got your back."

Danny laughs and bumps his fist against Grace's. "Good. That's good. Because Steve and Catherine are bringing dinner and all four of us are going to have a strategy session."

"Okay," Grace says, rolling her eyes. "Can I go back to my computer now?"

"Just until dinner," Danny says, leaning over so he can press a kiss against Grace's hair. "Thank you, Monkey."

"Danno!" Grace complains, waving Danny away. He doesn't fail to notice her fond smile, though. Danny lives for that smile.

~*~

Everyone comes in on the same plane, so while Danny can't possibly bring them all home in his car, he takes Grace to the airport to meet them. Of course, after Danny parks and they go into the airport, Steve and Catherine are right there, big grins on their faces. Fantastic. 

"What are, um," Danny says, rubbing the bridge of his nose with one finger. "What are you two doing here? I thought we were going to meet you at the hotel later."

"We figured since your Grandmothers are staying at the house," Steve says, throwing his arm over Danny's shoulders and guiding Danny toward the baggage claim, "that we would give them a ride. Maybe a little drive-by tour of the island."

"We?" Danny asks, looking first at Catherine, then at Grace, and then back to Steve. Steve's wearing the serene smile that he gets right before he does something he knows Danny isn't going to like. Danny narrows his eyes at Steve. "What do you mean, we?"

"Catherine and I," Steve replies, like he hasn't just suggested he and Catherine be alone with Danny's grandmothers. 

"F– _Heck_ no," Danny says, shrugging off Steve's arm and turning to face him. "Just because I let you talk me into having the barbecue at your place, for the view and the privacy... And into having my Grandmothers stay with you because Nana Beatrice is paranoid the hotel staff will swipe her belongings. Neither of those means I will let you drive my Nanas around in your truck, telling them God-knows-what about me. No."

"Oh, Danny," Catherine says, stepping closer and setting first her hand, then her chin on Danny's shoulder. "You're so cute when you think you're going to get your way."

Danny gapes at her. He turns to Steve. "Are you going to let her treat me this way?"

Steve raises his hands in surrender. "That's between you and the lady, Danno."

Before Danny can reply, Grace cries out, "Grandma!" and runs off. Danny turns to follow her path, and his heart fills up at the sight of just about his entire family in the whole world coming through into the baggage claim area. 

Danny's mom, Clara, leads the pack, followed by his Dad, Eddie. Eddie has Nana Betty on his arm, her movement slow and painful looking. In contrast, Nana Beatrice saunters through the airport like a woman half her age. Of course, Danny's sisters, Amy and Jessica, are there with their spouses and children as well. Eddie's brother, Tom, and his clan are there, along with a few others and Danny's not quite sure he remembers all of Tom's grandchildren's names.

There are about fifty of Danny's relatives standing around him in the Honolulu airport, when Steve slips his hand into Danny's and squeezes. Danny knows it's just for show, but as much as he loves and has missed his family, seeing them all at once is intimidating, and having a hand around his own makes Danny feel better. While Clara has Grace wrapped in a big hug, Beatrice passes them, crying out, "Daniel! We made it!"

Danny drops Steve's hand, taking three steps forward until he's in his Grandmother's arms. "Hi, Nana."

"Danny, baby," she says, kissing Danny's cheek and squeezing him tightly. "You good? You look good."

"Thanks," Danny says, not quite sure how to respond. He's never really _good_ good. Then he remembers he's supposed to be dating Steve and Catherine. Theoretically, dating people would make Danny happier, right? He puts on his best smile and says, "Nana, this is Catherine, and this is Steve."

Nana Beatrice turns toward Catherine, pulling her in and kissing both of her cheeks, leaving Catherine flustered. "A pleasure to meet you, Catherine!"

"You, too," Catherine says, clearing her throat.

Nana moves onto Steve, reaching up and pinching one of Steve's cheeks. Miraculously, Steve allows it with just a little chuckle. 

The rest of the relatives descend and Danny's hugged by everyone (and by his mother three times). Catherine and Amy have struck up a conversation about Catherine's shoes, while Eric has Steve by the arm and is telling his dad (Mike) and Danny's Uncle Tom about his time here in Hawaii last year, when he helped with the case Steve and Danny were working.

Clara murmurs in Danny's ear, "I knew it was only a matter of time."

"What?" Danny asks, his attention drawn away from Eric's (completely wrong) version of events. 

"You've been talking about Catherine all year," Clara replies, winding her arm into Danny's. "And you've been talking about Steve twice as long. Baby, I'm glad you're letting yourself move on."

Danny tries not to roll his eyes. For one, he already moved on with Gabby, even though that didn't end up working out. And for two, Danny's not even in a real relationship with Steve and Catherine. They're his best friends, but that's it. Still, he doesn't want to rock the boat by admitting to his lie within the first ten minutes of the family reunion. "Thanks, Ma," Danny says, instead. 

The next twenty minutes are a maelstrom of making sure everyone has their bags and getting everyone into the hotel shuttles. Everyone except Danny's grandmothers, of course, who Steve deftly directs toward his truck, Betty on one arm and Beatrice on the other. Danny, Grace, and Catherine follow with their bags. 

As they amble to the parking garage (slowly because of Nana Betty's knees), Catherine leans toward Danny and says, "We'd better be careful. It looks like your grandmothers are trying to steal our boyfriend."

Hearing the words "our boyfriend" come out of Catherine's mouth makes Danny's brain trip up. It takes a moment for his mouth to start working, and when it does, it's a joke that comes out. "They, uh, they can have him."

Catherine laughs. "Aw, come on. I think if we work together, we could take them."

The laugh bubbles out of Danny before he realizes he's reacting. Since when is Catherine funny? After he falls behind the others in his confusion over the matter, Danny takes a few longer steps to catch up. Catherine gives Danny a questioning look, but he doesn't want to explain (especially in front of witnesses) that he was caught off-guard by Catherine's sense of humor. 

They reach Steve's truck before too long, Steve helping the Nanas up into the two front passenger seats, leaving Danny to deal with the luggage. The suitcases seem like they'll be fine in the truck bed, but Betty's carry on bag has magazines sticking out of pockets all over the outside, and Danny imagines them flying out of the bag and scattering all over the H1.

Instead, Danny hands the bag to Catherine as she gets into the back seat. "Here, babe."

"Oh," Catherine says, taking the bag from Danny and pressing a quick kiss to his cheek. "Thanks, sweetie!"

Before Danny gets back to the luggage, Steve's already there, taking the last suitcase from Grace and heaving it up into the truck. Danny tries to ignore the way Steve's biceps make his shirt stretch. 

Closing the tailgate, Steve smiles at Danny. "We'll see you guys at the house for the cook out."

"Yeah, yep," Danny says with a nod. "I'm thinking we should've rented a bus to get everyone out to your place. It's gonna be, like six or seven cabs full of people."

"Don't worry about it," Steve says to Danny. "Beatrice assures me they've got quite the nest egg from selling her aunt's apartment in Manhattan. She's paying for just about everything."

Danny's thinking that he'd rather Nana Beatrice hang onto that money for a rainy day, when Steve presses a quick kiss to Danny's lips. "Go make sure everyone's checked in, Danno. Cath and I have got this."

Danny feels stunned, but he tries to hide it as he gathers up Grace and backs away from the truck, giving Steve space to get out of the parking spot and drive off. "C'mon, Monkey," he says, taking Grace's hand and leading her toward where the Camaro is parked. "Your cousins are probably already in the pool."

It's only five minutes down the road that Danny realized he and Steve were behind the truck when Steve kissed him. Neither of Danny's Nanas could have seen it from where they were sitting. God, Steve sure messed that one up. Danny hopes Steve will wait for an actual audience next time.

On the drive to the hotel, Danny looks in his rearview mirror at Grace, catching her eye. "I hope this isn't too weird for you, Monkey."

"Nope," she says with a matter-of-fact shrug, like nothing is wrong.

Danny's work partner just kissed him. On the _lips_. Danny's world feels like it's tilting sideways, but Grace is just fine. That's great.

~*~

Danny makes sure each of his relatives have his phone number and Steve's address before leaving Grace with his sisters and heading for the house. He and Grace helped prep everything that morning, but there's no way he's going to let Steve and Catherine get roped into service by Nana Beatrice alone. And, there's no way Danny's going to miss an opportunity for damage control before the rest of the family is at the house. There's no telling what Betty and Beatrice have gotten out of Steve and Catherine in Danny's absence. 

Danny parks in the driveway, right behind Steve's truck and beside Catherine's car. He approaches the house tentatively, not quite sure what he'll find once he's in there. Danny opens the front door quietly and immediately hears voices coming from the dining room. Through the archway between the living and dining rooms, Danny sees Steve sitting at the table, a bright grin on his face.

Rounding the corner, Danny hears Catherine cry, "Oh, my god! He did not!"

"He did," Betty says. Her voice has always been quieter than Beatrice's, but now it sounds weaker than when Danny was a kid. He knows he should feel lucky that Nana Betty is still alive at 85 years old, but still it feels like time is trying to steal his grandmother away. Betty notices Danny standing there, and she smiles at him. "He ran almost five blocks, completely naked, before Eddie could catch him."

Danny's cheeks feel like they burst into flames. "Nana!" Of course they're telling that story. That's the story they love to tell over and over again. It's not Danny's fault he didn't understand decency laws when he was three years old. 

Beatrice laughs and says, "Nobody in the neighborhood mistook him for one of Levinsky boys again after _that_!"

Danny watches in horror as each set of eyes lands on him and everyone simultaneously ponders on the status of Danny's foreskin. "This is not happening," Danny says as he turns away. 

Nana Beatrice stops Danny with a quick hand on his arm. "Oh, come back here, Daniel. It was just a joke." She pokes Danny in the ribs with a gentle finger. "Besides, it's not like it's a surprise to these two." She grins and pats Danny's cheek. 

"It doesn't matter what they've seen, Nana," Danny says, taking her hand. "You're getting your kicks at my expense and I don't appreciate it, thank you."

Beatrice looks at Danny with her watery brown eyes. She takes a quick breath and says, "No. You're right. I'm sorry, Danny."

"Thanks, Nana," Danny says, giving Beatrice a hug.

Nana Betty catches Danny's eye over Beatrice's shoulder and says, "Well, I'm not sorry!" There's a twinkle in Betty's eye, and Danny laughs because he can tell she doesn't mean it. 

"Come on, Danny," Catherine says, patting the side of Danny's hip (which is pretty much his ass). "You know Steve and I begged for all the stories about you as a kid. Absolutely gave them no choice in the matter."

"Still," Danny says, rubbing at his face. God, he still feels like he's blushing.

Steve stands and says, "Why don't we leave the ladies to their conversation, Danny? We can get the grill going."

Danny recognizes the invitation for an out if Danny wants one, and dear God does he want one. "Yeah, sure," he says. "Let's make sure we feed the hungry masses!"

Danny leads the way to the kitchen, and once he's out of sight of the dining room, he slumps against the kitchen counter. As Steve follows him into the room, Danny asks, "Why did I think this was a good idea? You got your gun on you? 'Cause I'm just saying, you could shoot me in the head and it would be better than this."

Steve chuckles and squeezes Danny's shoulder. "C'mon. It's not that bad. You just happened to show up at the worst possible moment. Mostly your Nanas have been asking us questions." Steve gives Danny's shoulder another squeeze, and then opens one of the utensil drawers. 

"Oh, yeah?" Danny asks, watching Steve pull a long lighter out of the drawer and cross the kitchen toward the back door. Danny follows Steve. "About what?"

Steve shrugs and nods toward the grill cover. "Help me with this, would you?" Danny grabs the opposite end and they pull up the cover, shaking off some of that morning's rain. Steve clears his throat and says, "Just questions about your life here. What we do for fun. If you're happy."

Curious, Danny asks, "What did you tell them? About the last one?"

"I said we're working on it." Steve gives Danny a quick, but sincere smile before turning on the propane and using the lighter to start the grill. "They can't expect results overnight, after all."

Danny laughs. He points back toward the house and says, "I'll get the meat from the fridge. God knows we need to get started cooking that mountain of meat if we're ever going to finish."

On the way back with the plate piled high with hamburger patties, Danny manages to grab two of the longboards he and Catherine stashed in one of the coolers that morning. He hands the plate to Steve and then uncaps both beers, giving one of those to Steve as well. 

Steve thanks Danny with a nod and a clink of his bottle against Danny's. 

"You're sure about this?" Danny asks, watching as Steve adjusts the height of the flames. "It's not too late to send everyone to a restaurant."

"What restaurant is going to take fifty people at the last minute?" Steve says, shaking his head as he takes the plastic wrap off the plate of burgers. "Besides, we already bought all the food. We might as well eat it."

"And you're sure you're okay letting Beatrice and my mother take over your kitchen all afternoon?" Danny winces. "I should've insisted on having this at my place."

"You mean the house you _just_ moved into," Steve says with a cheeky grin. "The one with boxes everywhere and no sofa and no back yard? That house?"

"Yeah, just rub it in." Danny takes a sip of his beer and sighs. "But really, Steve. Thank you."

"Just doing what any boyfriend would do," Steve says, with another one of those grins. Danny always found them amusing before, but now, with Steve using the smile right after calling himself Danny's boyfriend, has Danny's heart flipping over in his chest. 

Danny stomps down on that observation as hard as he can, pinching the skin on his wrist with the other hand and giving Steve a nonchalant chuckle. "Yeah, of course."

Steve turns his attention toward the grill and says, "Alright! Burgers for the Williams clan, coming up!"

~*~

Later, when everyone is at Steve's house (most of them in the backyard), Danny's sitting with Catherine in his lap (not by his choice), talking to his Uncle Tom. 

"Everyone knows the Jets would've made it to the playoffs this year if Ryan had been using more traditional, triad-based plays," Tom says, shaking his head and sighing into his beer. "Damn shame."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," Catherine says, trailing her fingers up and down Danny's neck. "Just because something's traditional, doesn't mean it's the best thing for the job."

"Like a pretty lady such as yourself going into the Navy?" Tom asks, with this tone in his voice that makes Danny sit up straighter and ball his hands into fists. 

Catherine scoffs. “Oh, come on. Like I haven’t had to deal with this every day since I joined the Navy, from men bigger and scarier than you.” She stands up and holds out her hand to Danny. “C’mon, baby. Let’s give your uncle a few minutes to pull his head out of his ass.”

Tom gapes, his cheeks going red, and Danny finds himself grinning as he puts his hand in Catherine’s and lets her help him to his feet. They cross the yard, toward the buffet table Beatrice and Clara stocked with all manner of salads and treats within short order. 

Danny pulls Catherine closer and says in her ear, “I’m really sorry about him. Usually we try to keep him to just one or two beers, but I’m pretty sure Bobby slipped him a shot while no one was looking.”

Catherine waves off Danny’s concern. “It’s fine. Well, it’s not _fine_ ,” she says, rolling her eyes, “but I understand. My family isn’t exactly asshole-free, either. I find it’s best to just walk away, you know?”

“Yeah, probably,” Danny says, reaching past Catherine to grab a piece of pineapple from the tray on the table. “In this family, we usually end up throwing a punch or two before the night is over.”

Danny bites off half of the piece of pineapple, and while he’s chewing, Catherine gets this look on her face. Before he can ask her what’s up, she grabs Danny’s hand and eats the rest of the pineapple right out of his fingers. Her teeth and lips caress Danny’s skin and suddenly he’s light-headed, his blood rushing south. 

“Cat,” Danny says in a warning, but she doesn’t listen to him.

Grinning, Catherine licks a drop of pineapple juice from Danny’s hand. When she finally releases him, she says, “Thanks, honey!”

Danny groans, but before he can hiss at Catherine that she’s gone too far, she’s escaping, heading for Grace down by the beach. Beside him, Danny’s nephew Eric whistles. 

Danny throws him a dirty look, but Eric’s not deterred. “Man, I wish I had a girlfriend that hot. You’re one lucky dude.”

“Uh-huh,” Danny agrees, though he can’t say he’s feeling very lucky right now. He turns toward the buffet table and looks for some sort of food to drown his sorrows in. “You still with your boyfriend? What’s his name?”

“Jose,” Eric replies, stuffing this dessert cannoli thing into his mouth. While he chews, Eric shrugs. “Yeah, I guess. We hang out. I thought I might’ve had a chance with these two girls, Christina and Paige, but Christina’s really traditional, you know? Doesn’t want to date any boys until after graduation.”

“Good for her,” Danny says, giving Eric a look to make sure he’s paying attention. “Last thing you want to do is get a girl pregnant, especially before you’re married.”

“Oh my god,” Eric says, rolling his eyes and walking away. Danny smiles to himself. Whenever he can combine good advice with mortification for any of his younger relatives, he’s going to do it.

Picking up another piece of pineapple, Danny wanders toward where Steve is manning the grill. “Still at it, huh?” Danny asks, standing closer to Steve than he would if he weren’t trying to convince his family he was a normal person in a normal relationship. “You want me to take over for awhile?”

“Nah,” Steve says, bumping his shoulder against Danny’s. “There’s just these few burgers left, and those pineapple slices, and then I’m going to shut it down.”

Danny notices the self-satisfied smile on Steve’s face and a thought occurs to him. “You like playing host, don’t you?”

After a quick frown and a thoughtful tilt of his head, Steve says, “Yeah, I guess I do. It’s fun. Different.”

“Different, how?” Danny asks, watching as Steve starts pulling pineapple off the grill and onto a plate. “My family that weird?”

Steve shakes his head. “Not particularly. They’re just _more_ than I’m used to, I guess.”

“More personality?” Danny asks with a laugh, noticing more than one loud conversation going on amidst the party.

“More people,” Steve says, looking down, like he’s embarrassed. 

Danny sighs. He should’ve remembered. None of Steve’s parents had all that much family. He knows there’s an aunt on the McGarrett side, but he doesn’t know much about Steve’s mom’s family, or his pop’s family. “Joe’s family?”

“Estranged,” Steve says. “He’s got a couple of brothers, I think. Monogamists."

"Ah." Danny takes the plate Steve hands him and holds it while Steve finishes up with the grill. "I take it they weren't too happy when Joe married John and Doris?"

Shaking his head, Steve says, "Not so much." He takes the plate back from Danny, and says, "So, I saw you and Catherine putting on a show over there." He nods toward the buffet table.

Danny's worried Steve is jealous, so he quickly assures Steve, "Hey, that was all her idea. I think she was trying to literally kill me."

Steve laughs and walks over toward the table, so Danny follows him.

Leaning closer, Danny murmurs to Steve, "It's not funny, man. She keeps sitting in my lap and kissing me. It's very confusing. You've got to get her to stop!"

Steve sets down the plate he was carrying and turns toward Danny with that smirk that Danny knows means trouble. 

"Oh, no."

Before Danny can stop him, Steve has his arms around Danny and is brushing his nose against Danny's as he says, "Oh, don't be such a spoilsport, snookums."

Danny wants to push Steve away and yell at him for making fun of Danny, but he can't do that, because his mother and aunts are cooing at them from the other side of the buffet table. If he's going to keep up this illusion, Danny has to play along. 

With a smile, Danny wraps his arms around Steve and says in a low, tight voice, "You are so paying for this later."

Steve laughs and says, "Quick, while everyone's watching."

Danny starts to ask what Steve's going to do while everyone's watching, but then Steve's lips are on Danny's, and Danny's eyes slide shut, and he can't tell up from down. When Steve pulls back, Danny opens his eyes again. The world stops spinning, but Danny thinks there must still be something wrong with his equilibrium, because Steve's eyes look soft and hooded. 

Danny clears his throat and takes half a step away from Steve. He glances around and everyone's quickly looking away, like they don't want to be caught looking at Danny and Steve. "Satisfied?" Danny asks Steve.

Steve grins and says, "For now." He leaves, following Catherine down toward the beach and Danny's left there, blinking after Steve.

Danny's going to die this week. If this is the sort of shit he has to deal with, there's no way he's going to survive. Not with his pride intact, anyway. 

~*~

(vomiting trigger warning) An armload of empty beer bottles in his arms, Danny heads into the house, depositing them in the kitchen bin. He's about to head out again, to join everyone at the bonfire out on the sand, when he hears a loud retching noise coming from the downstairs bathroom. Oh, great.

Danny sticks his head into the living room, and sees his cousin Bobby is passed out on the couch. Bobby would've been Danny's first guess for who was puking their guts out after having a few too many. Sighing, Danny goes back to the kitchen and fills a glass with tap water.

He brings the water with him, going to the bathroom door and tapping on the door. "Hey, it's Danny."

"Ugh," the person on the other side says, and Danny knows that groan.

"Dad. What's wrong?"

The door opens and Danny cringes at the sour smell, taking a step backward, even as he hands the glass to his father. Dad takes it with a thankful nod and says, "Stomach bug. Went through the station earlier this week. I thought I was spared, but I guess not."

"Too bad," Danny says with a sigh, looking out the window at everyone having a good time. "You want me to take you back to the hotel?"

Dad shakes his head. "Stuck in a suite with your mother and both your sisters' families? I don't think so. Besides, I'd probably just get them sick, and I don't think the baby can handle something like this without ending up in the hospital."

Understanding, Danny nods and sighs. "Alright. I'll bring you to my place. There's just the one bed, so I'll have to sleep on the floor or something…"

"Oh, don't be silly," Dad says, about to clap Danny on the shoulder before he appears to think better of it. "You can sleep here with Steve and Catherine. No one cares that you aren't married yet."

Danny almost says that _he_ cares, but he's supposedly been seeing them for almost six months. It's not like he can protest and say that he's _not_ sleeping with them. No one would believe that, especially not his parents. Danny lived with them during the Chad Dunham era of high school. Danny had been having so much sex with his boyfriend he almost flunked out of school, so getting his parents to believe he'd be in a sexless relationship for more than a few weeks isn't going to happen. 

"Yeah, that'll work," Danny lies. "C'mon. Let's get you back to my house."

"Get your mother to come, too," Dad says, taking a sip of water and grimacing. "I think I'm going to need someone to take care of me."

Of course. "Sure, Pop." 

It takes an hour or so to get his parents over to his house and settled. At that time, Danny beats a hasty retreat, really not wanting to listen to his father throw up. As he leaves, Danny asks his mother, "Are you sure you're going to be okay with just the two of you?"

"We'll be fine, Daniel," Clara says, patting Danny's cheek. "We've had ten years to get used to being just the two of us after your mima passed."

Sighing, Danny nods and looks down, unable to meet his mother's eyes. Everyone in the family misses Mary, but Danny knows Clara misses her most of all. They'd been inseparable almost their whole lives. You don't lose someone like that without losing some of yourself, too. To be honest, Danny's a little bit surprised that his parents have held together their relationship as well as they have in Mary's absence. "Yeah, I know, Ma. You're fine." Giving his mother a quick peck on the cheek, Danny says, "Call me if you need anything."

"I will," Clara assures Danny, not-so-subtly pushing him toward the door.

Danny sighs and heads out again. He drives back toward Steve's place, the whole time contemplating turning toward downtown and finding himself a nice, off-the-beaten-path motel room. Then he remembers that there are probably family members still at the house who will notice when Danny doesn't come back. That's not even taking into account Bobby, who is a notorious gossip, and will probably tell _everyone_ if he notices Danny didn't sleep at the house.

That leaves Danny with the interesting dilemma of where to sleep. The couch is as good as taken, and Beatrice and Betty are staying in Steve's guest room, per his insistence. The other bedroom, the one that used to be Steve's, is full of all of John's stuff that Steve couldn't bring himself to get rid of. 

That pretty much leaves just the lounge chair in the living room, or on the floor somewhere. Danny sighs and pulls into the driveway. Lounge chair it is. At least that way, if anyone questions his sleeping arrangements, he can claim that Steve snores. 

By the time he arrives at the house, it's quiet. All of Danny's relatives are gone, there's a text from his sister Amy that they've got Grace for the night, as planned, and Steve and Catherine are nowhere to be found on the first floor. 

Danny assumes they must have gone to bed already, so he takes off his shoes, finds the extra blanket from the hallway closet, and settles down into the lounge chair. The worst part of the whole arrangement isn't trying to fall asleep while not quite horizontal. No. It's the fact that not only has Bobby taken Danny's preferred sleeping spot in Steve's house, but he also snores like a chainsaw.

~*~

The stress of the day must get to Danny, though, because he starts awake when someone taps his arm. Blinking stupidly, Danny looks at the shadow next to him for far too long before recognizing it. "Catherine?"

"Hey, Danny," she whispers. "What are you doing down here?"

Danny licks his lips to unstick them from each other, swallows, and murmurs, "No room at the inn."

Catherine huffs an almost-silent laugh, putting her hand on his arm and squeezing it. "You can't sleep in the chair all night. Come upstairs."

"Upstairs where?" Danny asks, but he finds himself halfway on his feet, obeying her order. "You guys got another bed up there I don't know about?"

"No," Catherine says, taking Danny's hand and leading him toward the stairs, "but Steve's bed is plenty big enough for three."

Danny stops short, Catherine's momentum pulling on his arm until she stops, too. "Danny?"

Swallowing, Danny thinks about what he wants to say here. "Okay, so here's the thing," he says softly, mindful of Bobby sleeping just twenty feet away. "People don't normally sleep in the same bed as people they're not _sleeping_ with, and as much as we've been pretending, you and me and Steve are not together, Catherine."

"I know," she says, at once tender and exasperated. "I know that, Danny. I'm not asking you _to bed_ to bed. I'm saying there's plenty of room for you to sleep, just sleep. As friends."

Danny nods, relieved, and not quite sure whether or not this was the answer he expected from her. Mostly, he just feels overwhelmingly tired and confused. "As friends," he says, still not quite sure he believes it.

"Yes," Catherine says, squeezing Danny's hand with a soft chuckle. "Steve and I are used to close quarters in combat situations, and everything. It's not a big deal. Seriously."

Allowing himself a few steps closer to the stairs, Danny asks, "You're sure Steve is okay with this?"

"Of course he is," Catherine insists, drawing Danny up a few of the stairs. "Besides, he's already asleep. He's not going to mind."

Danny's not so sure about that, but a soft bed, with a soft pillow and actual sheets is sounding really good right now. Nodding, Danny says, "Yeah, okay," and follows Catherine up the rest of the stairs.

Just like she said, Steve is already asleep, curled up directly next to the right side of the bed. While Catherine's opening one of Steve's drawers, and then handing Danny a pair of basketball shorts, Danny asks, "Does he always sleep like that?"

Catherine snorts softly and replies, "Only when he's cold."

She climbs back into the bed, toward the middle, and turns Steve toward her. She moves him around until she's got her head on his shoulder and one of his arms around her waist. Danny finds it odd that Steve didn't wake up at all during the process, and then he feels a little bit like he's watched something far too intimate for his comfort. 

He escapes into the bathroom, where he uses the toilet, gets a drink of water from the sink, and changes into the shorts Catherine gave him. They hit further past his knees than Danny would like, but otherwise fit fine. Danny contemplates leaving his button-down shirt on, but it's starting to pull at his shoulders funny and he just wants to be free of it for a few hours, at least. 

Danny goes to bed in a tank top and shorts, laying down next to some of his best friends in the world and feeling like an intruder. He shouldn't be here. He shouldn't have lied. He shouldn't feel like all he wants in the world is to close the distance between where he's laying, as straight as a board, and where Catherine and Steve are tangled together. 

Catherine kicks, hitting Danny's thigh with her cold toes. For a second, Danny thinks she did it in her sleep, but then she whispers, "Stop thinking so hard and go to sleep, Danny."

Danny kicks back, just barely grazing Catherine's foot, and then turns into his side, getting more comfortable. It's not as nicely worn in as Danny's bed, but it's comfortable, and smells like Steve's laundry detergent, which is a familiar scent at this point. Danny listens to Catherine and Steve breathing, he listens to Bobby's snores from downstairs, he listens to the ocean, and the slowing beat of his own heart in his ears. He falls asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Danny wakes up with Rachel's hair in his face, and Stan's warm fingers laced with his. Except, that's not right. Danny hasn't lived with Rachel and Stan for over five years. Blinking open his eyes, Danny realizes he's not in the old house in New Jersey. He's in Steve's house, in Steve's bedroom, and he's been sleeping in Steve's bed.

It's Catherine's hair in Danny's face, and her body he's pressed against, one ankle thrown over her calf. It's Steve's hand Danny's been holding onto, their entwined fingers resting on Catherine's hip.

Jesus. Danny's a menace. 

He knew old habits died hard, but he didn't think that would extend to accidentally cuddling with his friends, without their consent. What if they had woken up first? Danny would've looked like such a creep.

He still looks like such a creep!

Face burning with embarrassment, Danny carefully lets go of Steve's hand and rolls away from Catherine. He manages to get free of the bed without waking them up, which feels like god damn miracle.

The morning is slightly chilly, now that he's out from under the blankets, but it's not that bone-deep cold he was used to in New Jersey. Danny grabs his shirt from the night before and starts to put it on, before he realizes that if he was actually dating Steve and Catherine, he probably wouldn't lounge around Steve's house in dirty clothes. He'd probably borrow one of Steve's sweatshirts. 

As much of a control freak as Steve is about always driving Danny's car, fortunately he's much less controlling when it comes to sharing his things. Danny doesn't even have to think twice before poking through Steve's closet until he finds a hooded zip-up sweatshirt that isn't too oversized. Danny pulls it on and escapes from the bedroom, intending on starting a pot of coffee.

He's only halfway down the stairs when Danny smells that someone's already started the coffee, and breakfast. Danny guesses it's Nana Beatrice, and when he gets through the kitchen door, he sees he's right. "Hey, Nana."

Beatrice turns, smiling, with a spatula in her hand. "Good morning, Daniel. How did you sleep?"

Danny surprised to be telling the truth when he smiles back and says, "Good. You?"

Waving her hand in a so-so manner, Beatrice shrugs. "Alright."

"Your bed okay?" Danny asks with a frown as he grabs a mug from the cabinet and starts pouring his coffee. 

"Oh, it's fine, thank you," she says, scraping eggs from the pan onto a plate. "It's just quite a time difference, coming from New Jersey. I started waking up at one o'clock in the morning."

"Nana Betty still asleep?" Danny asks, taking the plate Beatrice hands him, because he is incapable of refusing food from any of his grandmothers. It doesn't help that his stomach growls at the sight. He takes a bite and just about dies with pleasure. "Did you put cheese in these?"

"Just a touch," Beatrice says, taking a sip of her coffee. "Betty's still asleep. She sleeps like the dead, which let me tell you, has been bad for my heart these past few years." She widens her eyes and raises her brows, clearly looking for a reaction from Danny.

Danny doesn't want to laugh at the prospect of his Nana Betty passing on, but with that look on Beatrice's face, he can't help it. "Nana, come on. Please, you're the guest here. Sit down and let me do something for you."

"Finish eating," Beatrice insists. "Least I can do for you after your man invited us to have our reunion in his home."

Danny smiles and takes another bite. "I think he likes having everyone here. He doesn't have much family."

"Ah," Beatrice says, leaning against the counter and taking another sip of her coffee. "And Catherine?"

Oh! Danny knows this answer, as it was one of the things Catherine grilled into his head. "Her parents live in Arizona now," Danny tells Beatrice. "Her father's retired Navy, both her mothers are retired teachers."

"Siblings?"

Danny shakes his head. "Only child. Can you believe that?"

Beatrice laughs. "Says the man with one daughter and no other children."

"A whole generation later," Danny points out, gesturing with his fork. " _Nowadays_ people don't have such big families. It costs too much."

"Or," Beatrice replies, reaching over the kitchen island to tap Danny on the nose, "they're afraid of commitment, so they wait too long before they start having babies, or they get divorced before they can have more babies."

"Jeez," Danny says waving away Beatrice's finger. "Okay, I get it. I'm still the black sheep of the family who got divorced. Thanks for the reminder, Nana."

"Daniel," Beatrice says sharply, though her expression softens almost immediately. "All I'm trying to say is that you seem happy, and not to wait too long before making this permanent."

Danny understands by "this" Beatrice means Danny's _entirely fabricated_ relationship with his best friend and said best friend's girlfriend. As much as Danny can admit to himself that a relationship like the one he's pretending to have might be nice, he also has to remember that none of this is real. It won't last the week, much less forever. 

Still, Danny doesn't want Beatrice knowing that, or worrying over him more than she already does. He smiles and nods, saying, "Yeah. I know."

As Danny finishes up his eggs, Steve comes into the kitchen, a serene smile on his face. He doesn’t even seem surprised that Danny’s wearing his sweatshirt, or maybe he just doesn’t notice. “G’morning,” Steve says, pouring himself a cup of coffee and then joining Danny at the breakfast bar. He slings an arm over Danny’s shoulder, kisses Danny’s temple (his scruff catches on Danny's hair), and asks, “Why didn’t you make me breakfast, too, Danno?”

Danny thinks about smiling through the nickname, for Beatrice’s sake, but he can’t do it. “You know I don’t like it when you call me that.”

“Sorry, _baby_ ,” Steve says with a grin, rubbing the bridge of his nose against the side of Danny’s face. Danny should find the action uncomfortable at least, but he’s so used to Steve being in his space that it doesn’t even phase him.

“And Nana made _me_ eggs,” Danny adds with a smile toward Beatrice. “And I’d tell you to fend for yourself, but I know you’re useless in the kitchen.” Danny stands up, heading for the refrigerator. “What do you want? Scrambled? Over easy?”

Steve sets down his mug and throws his arms wide. “Come on, Danny. I was kidding. Don’t worry about it.”

“Oh, but see,” Danny says, his smile only half for Beatrice’s benefit, the rest for himself. “I _am_ worrying about it, now, Steven. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, after all.” Danny pulls the carton of eggs and the block of cheese out of the refrigerator. “Besides, I can make some for Catherine, and Betty, if she ever wakes up.”

Beatrice laughs and pats Danny on the shoulder as she passes him toward the doorway. “I’ll go wake up my lazy wife. She’ll take her eggs scrambled, just like I taught you, honey.”

“Got it,” Danny says, leaning in to press a quick kiss to Beatrice’s cheek when she offers it. 

After Beatrice is gone, Steve moves closer, standing next to where Danny is starting to crack eggs into a bowl. He says, “Really, Danny. I was just kidding. Don’t make me breakfast.”

“What are you going to do?” Danny asks with a chuckle. “Tie my hands behind my back so I _can’t_ make you breakfast?” He raises his eyebrows in Steve’s direction, and gets an odd shrug in response. “Besides, I’m already making some for the ladies. Making extra for you isn’t any more difficult.”

Steve shakes his head and runs his arm into Danny’s shoulder. “You’re ridiculous. I’m doing the dishes after you’re done cooking.”

“You say that like I’m going to fight you over them,” Danny points out, “which is clearly insane. Of course you’re doing the dishes.”

Steve laughs, his smile wide and full of bright teeth, his neck long as he throws his head back. It’s a sight Danny can’t help but enjoy, and he doesn’t want to think about what that could mean at a deeper level.

Enjoying his friend’s company is reason enough to savor Steve’s laughter.

~*~

Danny can't believe it when Catherine and Steve agree to go to the zoo with almost the entire Williams clan. Danny's Pop stays at Danny's place, too sick to be up on his feet all day, but everyone else comes. Getting fifty people first to the zoo, and then around the zoo is like herding cats, if all of the cats had hot tempers and wicked tongues. Even Danny's niece, Dylan, who is only seven years old, can dish it out with the rest of them. 

Danny spends most of his time pushing Betty around in the wheelchair the park rented to them, and keeping his eyes out to make sure no one gets lost. They've made it all the way from the entrance to the African animal exhibits, when Chris (one of Jess' husbands), asks, "Hey, why don't I take a turn pushing? Is that okay, Betty?"

Chris is a stand up guy, and Betty nods, patting Danny's hand and thanking him for pushing her for so long. Except now they're walking along and Danny doesn't know what to do with his empty hands. 

He shoves them into his pockets and watches his family. Danny's Uncle Tom is being dragged from one exhibit to the next by his two wives, Kelly and Cheryl. His face is red and he's complaining almost non-stop, but he smiles when no one else is looking. 

Beatrice has a great-grandchild on one arm and Danny's sister Amy on the other. They've been arguing non stop about whether elephants should even be kept in zoos or not. Amy is on the keep-them-in-the-zoo side, Beatrice on the other. 

Bobby has been talking to these two tourists for the past twenty minutes, even though Danny's pretty sure they only speak Korean, and Bobby flunked out of Spanish, if memory serves. The tourists seem to be having fun observing Bobby and making facial expressions at him, so Danny lets the conversation continue. 

And then there are Steve and Catherine. Grace, the little sneak, has been holding hands with both of them, and looking back at Danny like she wants him to watch her doing it. Danny knew letting her watch _The Parent Trap_ was a bad idea. 

Danny joins them when they get to the Lion exhibit, standing next to Catherine, with Steve on the far end and Grace still between the two of them. Grace stands up on the fence so she can see over it and get a better look at the lions. There’s two females and a male lion in the enclosure, which Danny is sure has to do more with people’s perceptions of how families are structured, than how an actual pride would look in the wild. Catherine turns toward Danny and smiles at him, folding her hand into his.

He has to admit, he doesn’t hate the way Catherine’s hand feels in his.

“They’re so pretty,” Grace says, and it takes Danny a second to realize she’s talking about the lions.

Leaning down to Grace’s level, Steve says, “Did you know that it’s the girl lions who do the hunting?”

“Really?” Grace asks, a delighted smile on her face. 

Steve nods, his face completely serious. “Oh, yeah. They’re the ferocious ones. The boy lions are all show.”

“Like Danno,” Grace says, smirking over at Danny.

Danny isn’t offended in the least. He’s made a very concerted effort over the years to show his daughter that men can be and should be gentle and caring, especially around the people they love. It’s one of the best lessons Danny ever learned from his father, and he wants nothing more than to pass on that lesson.

Laughing at Grace’s assessment of him, Danny catches Steve’s eyes. At this point, Danny’s pretty good at reading Steve’s expression, so he recognizes the amusement at Danny’s expense. The sticky thing is that there’s something more to Steve’s expression in the way his eyes are so soft as they meet Danny’s. Danny’s not used to this look, and he’s not sure what to do with it.

Frankly, it reminds Danny of the way Steve looks at Catherine sometimes, so what does that mean? Does it mean that Steve’s being one hell of an actor, playing it up for Danny’s mother as she passes by behind them, patting Danny’s shoulder and caressing Grace’s hair? Or does it mean something else?

As they wander away from the lions, Danny’s hand in Catherine’s and Grace’s in Steve’s, Danny has a realization that scares the crap out of him. He doesn’t want Steve to be acting. He doesn’t want to let go of Catherine’s hand.

This _want_ in the center of Danny’s chest feels too big, big enough that Danny can’t breathe. He twists his hand out of Catherine’s and murmurs something about finding the restroom. He walks quickly past this big sculpture of a giraffe and through a picnic area, until he’s relatively alone on a path toward another section of the zoo.

Finding a bench, Danny sits down on it and puts his head in his hands. Surely he can think through this and get his head straight before anyone starts missing him too bad.

So, Danny might want this relationship he’s pretending at this week. Does he want it because he actually has feelings for Steve and for Catherine? Or, does Danny want it because he wants a family back, and playing at one has crossed some wires in his brain? Danny thinks about trying to form a family with someone else, but he keeps coming up empty. 

For a minute or two, he thought maybe Gabby would want to help him form a family, but they never found a third before she ended up moving halfway across the world for her job. Danny has no idea how he’d ever build a family with someone who couldn’t be there day in and day out. He lived through that once with Stan’s business travel, and that didn’t work for Danny at all.

Why does being in a relationship with Catherine feel like it could be different? After all, she could get deployed at any time. In fact, most of the time Danny has known her, she's been away. The past three months that she's been stationed at Pearl Harbor have steeply increased the amount of time Danny has spent with Catherine. What's there to say she won't end up deployed far overseas again in the near future?

Danny thinks it has a lot to do with how _sure_ of Catherine Steve appears to be. Never once has Steve expressed to Danny doubts about Catherine being with him and in his life. Okay, so maybe Steve doesn't talk about his feelings all that much, but he does talk to Danny, especially about the important stuff. Steve and Catherine appear solid. 

Danny wonders if they actually are, or if he's got the privilege of an outsider's view on the situation. He doesn't think so. After all, Grace was right when she said Danny spends a lot of time with Steve and Catherine, especially on football Sundays. He knows them as well as he's known any of his friends. Better, probably. 

Danny realizes that at some level, he's wanted this, probably for a very long time. Why else would it be Steve and Catherine's names on his tongue when his mother asked if he was seeing anyone?

Someone sits down on the other end of the bench, and Danny looks up to see his cousin, Bobby, kicking back, putting his arms behind his head. "Hey, Dan."

"Bobby," Danny replies warily, not quite sure what his cousin is up to. (Danny might also still be harboring a grudge that Bobby's height outpaced Danny's when Danny was sixteen and Bobby was only twelve.)

"Did you know," Bobby says, putting one ankle up on the opposite knee, "that chimpanzees are assholes?"

It's not the sentence Danny's expecting, so he can't help but exhale half a chuckle. "How so?"

"In their little tribes, like one of the male chimps is the leader," Bobby says, his voice fascinated, but also lazy, like he's (Danny suspects) really fucking stoned. "And this leader dude is like this manipulative, game-playing politician. Asshole."

"Did you, uh," Danny asks, turning in his seat to get a better look at Bobby. "Did you learn that all today?"

"No, man," Bobby grins, his eyes glassy. "YouTube." He blinks at Danny once, slowly. "Your guy Steve is, like, the baddest bitch around, man. And yet, nothing like the super villain chimp. Kudos."

"Uh, thanks," Danny says. Out of curiosity, Danny asks, "So, what do you think of Catherine?"

"Smoking hot," Bobby says, his tone completely serious. "Funny. Seems nice. And, dude, she knows a _lot_ about weapons."

"She's a naval officer, Bobby," Danny points out. "It's her job."

Bobby doesn't really seem to be listening to Danny. "And you know what? You know what? Your Catherine can really drink a beer. Rachel hated beer, man. Who hates beer?"

"I don't know," Danny says, though he does know Stan isn't exactly a beer drinker either. "Are you trying to tell me it was a bad idea to marry above my station? Like my love life is fucking Downton Abbey?"

“Oh, shit, man!” Bobby cries, reaching over and slapping Danny’s arm with the back of his hand. “I love that show!” Suddenly, he seems to realize that he’s lost the thread of whatever he’s trying to say. “No, no. I mean, if you like fancy shit, you should definitely try to be some rich dude’s swain-husband. That was never you, though, Danny. That’s all I’m saying.”

Danny nods, pretty sure he understands what Bobby’s getting at. “So, you think I have more in common with Catherine and Steve than I ever did with Rachel and Stan.”

“Totally,” Bobby replies, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “And you deserve that, man. You deserve the whole triad, and the marriage, and the house on the beach.” Bobby smirks at Danny, an expression Danny understands instantly.

Chuckling, Danny slugs Bobby back and says, “If I do marry Steve, you’re allowed to come visit three days a year. At most.”

Bobby scoffs. “C’mon, man! Can’t you see I’m totally suited to the Hawaii lifestyle? Why not three weeks?”

Danny bites his tongue on the three or four jokes he could make, and instead asks, “What about you? Not suited for the whole triad thing?”

A dark, almost ashamed look passes across Bobby’s face, and he shakes his head. “Nah, man. I like to keep my options open, you know?”

“Which is code for ‘I got my heart broken and I don’t want to talk about it’,” Danny points out, but he doesn’t push the issue any further. He takes a deep breath, noticing the knot in his gut isn’t quite as tight as it was five minutes ago. “I want it,” Danny admits. “The marriage, the house, everything. I want it so bad, man.”

“Aw,” Bobby says, shifting over and putting his arm around Danny, hugging him close. “It’s okay, bro. I’m a hundred percent sure your datefriends want the same.”

“You hardly know them,” Danny says, but he doesn’t want to hear about any apparent relationship crises from anyone else in the family, so Danny tries to put on a pleased smile. He thinks it comes out pretty genuine. “Thanks, Bobby.”

“See?” Bobby says, squeezing Danny once more before letting him go. “If you move me here, to this wonderful tropical paradise, I’ll be able to give you advice whenever you want!”

Laughing, Danny shakes his head and says, “I’ll keep that in mind.” 

~*~

The night before everyone is to fly back to New Jersey, they hold the actual birthday party. Danny takes his mother to the bakery in his neighborhood, where they pick up a ridiculous cake he ordered the week before. Catherine helps Danny’s aunts, Kelly, Cheryl, and Ellen, prepare enough lasagna for the entire crew, because it’s Betty’s favorite. Steve helps the kids blow up so many balloons that everyone has to wade through the living room. Eddie and Tom put up a banner they painted themselves (Danny’s fairly certain Grace and her cousins could’ve done a better job, and he says that out loud as Bobby helps him carry the cake through the house).

When they sing Happy Birthday, Danny has Catherine’s arm around his waist and Steve’s arm across his shoulders. Even though he’s not in Jersey, it feels like home. Danny doesn’t think twice about kissing Catherine’s temple, and then leaning his head against Steve’s shoulder. Grace and the other little kids help their Great-Grandmothers blow out the candles, and Danny cheers with the rest of the family when Beatrice gets the last one.

As Clara cuts up the cake and starts passing out slices, Steve disentangles himself from Danny. Steve walks away, putting his phone to his ear, and Danny's stomach drops. He says into Catherine’s ear, “Looks like we’ve caught a case.”

Catherine leans over to look past Danny, to where Steve has stopped out on the lanai, his silhouette dark against the last of the evening light. “I’ll help him,” Catherine says, patting Danny’s chest. “You stay here with your family.”

“Are you sure?” Danny asks, holding onto Catherine as she moves past him. “It’s my job, not yours.”

Catherine rolls her eyes. “Just let me do this for you, okay? Danny?” The look Catherine gives Danny is so serious and so _fond_ it makes Danny’s mouth go dry.

“Yeah,” he nods, pulling her into a quick hug before she gets away. “Okay. Thank you, babe.” The pet name rolls off Danny’s tongue before he can stop it. It’s not that he doesn’t use it pretty frequently, on anyone he considers a friend, but it feels different in this moment.

Catherine kisses Danny's cheek and smiles as she pulls away, heading out to listen in on Steve's conversation. When the two of them come back into the house, they head toward the bedroom upstairs. Danny wants to follow them, to get the scoop on what's going on, but he's not sure he's welcome. 

"Everything okay?" Danny's father asks in a low voice, his eyes cutting toward the stairs as well.

"No, fine," Danny says, waving off Eddie's concern. "There's a case, but they'll take care of it."

"Your boss isn't going to call you in?" Eddie asks, and Danny knows Eddie's used to a lifetime of being on call at the fire station. 

"Well, Steve is my boss, so..." Danny says with a smile and a vague hand gesture. 

Eddie nods and nudges Danny's ribs with his elbow. "Gotcha."

Eddie takes a long sip of his beer and sighs. He clears his throat and says, "It's good seeing you happy again, Daniel. Your mother and I have worried."

Danny rolls his eyes. "Gee, I'm sorry I didn't take that into account when Stan and Rachel _left me_."

Eddie cuffs Danny lightly on the back of the head. "Don't be a jackass! I'm trying to give you advice here."

Danny chuckles and rubs the back of his head. "What advice is that, Pa?"

"Be with the people you love, kiddo. Don't let anything take you away from that. I spent so much time working, instead of spending it with Mary, while I still could." He gives Danny a significant look, and Danny has to admit that look gets to him.

"I'll, uh, keep it in mind," Danny says, reaching to put his hand on Eddie's shoulder in thanks. He knows, _acutely_ , how dangerous his, Steve's, and Catherine's jobs all are. If he wants this triad at all, he's got to get it together soon. There's no telling how long it has left. 

Of course, that's under the assumption that Steve and Catherine might actually _want_ a relationship with Danny. For a guy who reads people for a living, Danny thinks he shouldn't be having this much trouble figuring out whether Steve and Catherine are acting, or if they've all three gone past acting over the course of the week. What's worse is the fact that Danny's pretty sure Steve isn't acting, but Catherine is. Maybe Danny just doesn't know Catherine as well, but he hates the thought that he might get in between Steve and Catherine and unbalance them. After all, Danny's marriage started out almost as unbalanced as you can get, and look how that turned out.

If they _do_ want him, Danny thinks it could be a fantastic relationship. He already knows how to get along with Steve on a friendship level, and Danny thinks any of the things Steve does that bother him, would be helped by having Catherine in the relationship as well. At least there would be someone else there to agree with Danny when he insists that Steve has blown past the boundaries people usually have no problem recognizing. 

Danny doesn't know Catherine quite as well as he knows Steve, but he likes what he does know. Plus, Steve has been with her for a long time, and Danny trusts Steve's judgement. Well, he trusts Steve's judgement about _this_ , not necessarily about food, or what sports are actually enjoyable.

Danny's pulled out of his thoughts when Grace hands him a plate with a giant slice of cake on it. "Thanks, Monkey," he says, pulling her into a hug with his free arm before she can get away. "Hey, what's with the giant piece? You _trying_ to fatten me up?"

"Maybe," she says with a wicked grin and a laugh. Before Danny can ask what she means by that, Grace escapes his hold and runs back toward Clara, who's dishing out the last few pieces to the kids.

Danny shakes his head and carves off a piece of the cake with his tiny plastic fork. As he lifts the fork to his mouth, Danny watches Steve and Catherine slip away without saying goodbye. The cake tastes like paper.

~*~

After the cake has been eaten, the family members ferried back to the hotel, and Danny's grandmothers helped into their room, Danny's left alone.

It's late, and Danny's exhausted, the week having caught up to him. Hell, it's caught up to him and passed him by, he feels so tired. He contemplates falling asleep on the couch, because miraculously, no one else has passed out there tonight. However, now that Danny knows how soft Steve's bed is, and how nice it smells, the couch looks like a prison cot.

Figuring Steve and Catherine probably won't be home tonight, if this case goes anything like all their other cases have gone, Danny heads upstairs and gets into the bed. He makes sure he's lying only on "his" edge of the mattress, just in case the others do come home soon. 

Danny loses consciousness quickly, and he thinks he dreams about Steve and Catherine being in the room. When he lifts his head up and looks around, he's still alone, and in the middle of the bed. Danny's still half asleep and too tired to move, so he settles back down. No one else is here anyway. It's not that disappointing.

~*~

The next time Danny wakes up, there's early-morning light through the window, and Danny has long, dark hair in his face. Again.

Danny really has to stop waking up like this. It's giving him too much hope. 

Taking his arm from around Catherine's waist, Danny tries to move away from her, only to realize that he's pinned in place. Steve's lined up behind Danny, chest-to-back, and he's hanging on with _his_ arm heavy around _Danny's_ waist.

Shit.

Danny tries to move Steve the way he saw Catherine do his first night in this bed, but Danny can't tell where the line is between enough force to move Steve and enough to wake him up. It doesn't help that Catherine's pressed tight against Danny's front. There's nowhere for Danny to go. 

He should go. The longer he lays like this, between his two closest friends in the world, the easier it is to pretend this is real. 

Danny pushes a little at Steve, but he just murmurs a bit in his sleep and squeezes Danny tighter, pressing what feels a lot like morning wood against the swell of Danny's ass. Danny shivers involuntarily, his own cock filling, even though he tries his best to think of anything that will get rid of his erection.

Danny's cock starts to press a little too close to Catherine, so he shifts his hips away from her as best he can. This means pressing his ass closer to Steve, but to be honest, he'd rather embarrass Steve than accidentally violate Catherine. 

Steve's fingers on Danny's hip flex, but then he goes still again, so Danny figures he's still asleep. Danny huffs. He's stuck here, isn't he?

After a few minutes of keeping his eyes closed and trying his best to keep still, Danny hears Catherine start moving against the sheets. He opens his eyes and watches her stretch out, arms coming up above her head. 

Catherine turns onto her back and then toward Danny, blinking in the morning sun. When she sees Danny, she smiles and whispers, "G'morning."

That smile does funny things to Danny's heart, and he can't help but smile back. "Hey," he whispers back. "Um, sorry about this. I can't exactly..." Danny gestures to Steve's arm tight around his waist.

Catherine laughs softly, which is a far cry from being pissed that her boyfriend is holding onto Danny the way he is. 

"It's not funny," Danny hisses under his breath. "He's totally…" Danny raises his eyebrows and jerks his head back toward Steve, "in his sleep. How do I get him to let go?"

Catherine shrugs and whispers back, "Can you really blame him though?"

" _What_?"

Catherine grins, mirth sparkling in her eyes. She scoots a little closer to Danny and looks right at him as she says, "Well, you do have the best ass."

"Am I dreaming?" Danny asks. "I have to be dreaming. There's no way–"

Catherine puts a finger over Danny's lips and he's sure she's going to chastise him for freaking out too much, but then she asks, "Can I kiss you, Danny?"

Danny's eyes flick to Catherine's mouth and he almost nods, before a thought occurs to him. "If you're being serious, and I really hope you are, Catherine, I _really_ think we should wait for Steve to wake up. He's my best friend, Cath, I can't–"

"Dummy," Catherine says with a chuckle, pointing last Danny, "Steve _is_ awake."

Danny looks over his shoulder and Steve's eyes are closed, but he's smiling this goofy smile. "How long have you been awake?"

"Long enough," Steve murmurs, running his hand up from Danny's hip to Danny's chest. "Don't let me stop you."

Danny chuckles, maybe a little hysterically. "'Don't let me stop you,' he says, like he doesn't mind if I just–"

"I don't," Steve says at the same time Catherine says, "He doesn't."

Catherine slips closer to Danny, taking his face in her hands as she brings her lips to his.

Danny likes to think he's a good man. He's been good this whole week. Respectful. He hasn't presumed anything or pushed any boundaries. When they agreed this relationship was just for show, Danny kept it that way, despite everyone in his family seeing what was apparently already there. The relationship was already there, and there's only so much a person can take, good or otherwise. Catherine's kiss breaks the fucking dam.

A noise erupts from Danny's throat, almost like he's dying, and he gets both hands on Catherine, pulling her closer and kissing her with all he's got. Behind Danny, Steve tightens his hold on Danny's torso and kisses the back of Danny's neck. 

"Oh, God," Danny groans against Catherine's lips.

She smiles and kisses him again, just for a moment, because Steve's pulling gently on Danny's chin, trying to get Danny to turn toward him. Danny goes, because he has no reason not to at this point, and his lips meet Steve's hard and hungry mouth. Danny's kissing Steve and Catherine's hands are pushing up on Danny's shirt, tangling in the hair on his belly, and he thinks (after his daughter being born) this is the second-best thing that's ever happened to him.

Of course, just as Danny gets back to kissing Catherine, his hand on her ass so he can pull her close, there's a knock on the door. All three of them freeze, but it's Catherine who clears her throat and calls out, "Yes?"

"Tell Danny he's supposed to take us to brunch in twenty minutes!" Beatrice calls from behind the door. "And he needs to look nice!"

With an amused grin and laughter in her voice, Catherine calls back, "Okay! I'll tell him."

After Beatrice's footsteps sound on the stairs (which Danny really wished she wouldn't have climbed, as they're not great for her hip), Danny falls back against the pillows and groans. He closes his eyes and says, "This is the worst."

"Danny," Steve says, his voice soft, and when Danny opens his eyes, Steve is looking at him with a soft smile. Steve looks up at Catherine for just a second before his smile widens and he returns his eyes to Danny's. "This is the last day your family's in town. You should spend it with them. Catherine and I aren't going anywhere."

Danny gives Steve a long look, and then turns to Catherine, who smiles and nods at him before dropping a kiss on Danny's shoulder. Relief uncoils in his chest and he lets out a breath he'd been holding. Then he claps his hands onto Catherine's wrist on one side, and Steve's knee on the other. "Well, you're wrong about that, because you two are going to brunch with everyone."

Steve groans, but says, "Okay, fine."

"Yeah?" Danny asks, looking back and forth between Steve and Catherine. "I mean, if you guys just got in, I'm sure I can make excuses…"

"Well, _I_ wouldn't miss the chance to say goodbye to your family," Catherine replies, kissing Danny's cheek before standing up from the bed. When Danny sees that Catherine's just wearing a tanktop and panties, he almost wants to forget about his family and pull her back into bed. 

Looking back at Steve, Danny says, "This is torture."

"No," Steve replies, getting out of bed, and Danny sees he's only wearing his boxer briefs. Steve stretches his arms over his head and says, "Sitting next to her at breakfast, with your whole family around you is going to be torture."

"Why?" Danny asks carefully, following Steve from the bed to the closet, where Steve is pulling out clothes for himself, and for Danny. 

Steve hands Danny one of Danny's shirts and says, "I ever tell you about what happened the Thanksgiving I met her parents?"

Danny takes the shirt and shakes his head. "No."

With a grin, Steve claps Danny on the shoulder. "I'll tell you later. C'mon. We're gonna be late."

Danny groans and dresses, enjoying the show as Catherine steps out of a quick shower and gets dressed, giving him flashes here and there of her completely undressed state. Danny joins Steve at the sink to shave, because he knows his mom is going to give him crap about it if he doesn't. "Seriously, tell me," Danny whispers, while Catherine is in the other room, putting on some of her jewelry.

Steve rinses off his razor and shakes his head. "Not going to spoil the surprise."

~*~

Danny tries to subtly shove Catherine's hand away from the inside of his thigh for the fifth time (the _fifth_ time!) since brunch started. It doesn't work. He leans over and whispers, "Catherine, I swear to god…"

"What?" she asks innocently, squeezing Danny's thigh before removing her hand and continuing her conversation with Amy. 

Relieved, Danny turns back toward Betty, "So, you were saying about the neighbor's dog?"

"They have _three_ of them," Betty explains, and Danny tries really hard to listen to his Nana's story, but it's more than a little difficult with Catherine's foot wrapped around Danny's ankle and Steve's fingers playing with the hair at the nape of Danny's neck. 

Still, Danny can't begrudge either of them the touches, as much as he might want to with his family as witness, because they're proof that Steve and Catherine want Danny. They might even want him as desperately as he wants them. 

Danny's halfway lost into a fantasy about Steve's fingers, when Grace calls to him from near the other end of the table. "Danno?"

Danny hasn't thought much about how this relationship is going to affect his daughter. He kind of figures, since Grace thought he was already dating Steve and Catherine, it probably won't change much. "What is it, Monkey?"

"Can we go to New Jersey for Christmas? Jenna wants to show me her cool new dollhouse!"

Danny calls back, "We'll have to work it out with your Mom and Pop, but I'm on board."

"Ooh, I'd love to go," Catherine says, knocking her shoulder against Danny's with a grin.

Across the table, Beatrice laughs. "You haven't had enough of us yet, honey? Oh, Daniel. You have to keep her." She turns her attention to Steve. "And what about you? Care to leave Hawaii for a white Christmas in New Jersey?"

Warmth radiates through Danny's whole body as Steve smiles his most charming smile and says, "You know what?" He meets Danny's eyes. "I would love to."

Danny feels like he doesn't deserve this at all. This is someone else's life, and Danny is dreaming, because there's no way he's this lucky in real life. Still, it's a great dream.

Beatrice kicks Danny under the table and says, "You have to keep both of them, and if I don't see some engagement rings by Christmas, there's going to be hell to pay."

"Jesus, Nana," Danny complains, completely sure she's putting the cart before the horse here. "Everything in good time."

"Daniel, you're over thirty-five. There's very little good time left," Beatrice replies. Eddie tries to shush her, but Danny waves his father off with a laugh.

"No, no. She kind of makes a good point."

Catherine's hand ends up back in Danny's lap, and Steve's arm around his shoulders, and Danny thinks good time can't happen soon enough.

~*~

After brunch and a few more hours wandering around the International Market, shopping for last-minute souvenirs and gifts, Danny goes to see his family off at the airport. Of course, Grace, Catherine, and Steve all tag along as well. When Danny asks what happened with the case the night before, Steve says, "It's a wait-and-see game at this point," which doesn't answer Danny's question, but does make him feel better about monopolizing their time. 

Danny hugs each and every member of his family as they enter the line for the security checkpoint. He spends a few extra moments with each of his sisters, and his parents, and especially his Nanas. Beatrice is last in line, shooing a few of the great-grandchildren ahead of her. She hugs Danny fiercely, saying, "Let your datefriends take care of you, Daniel. They're good for you."

Danny looks over to where Catherine is hugging Betty, and Steve is letting Danny's mom pat his cheeks. Eddie has Grace up off her feet in a giant bear hug and Danny feels tears start to prick at the corners of his eyes. "I will," he assures Beatrice.

Beatrice squeezes Danny's arm and says, "Well, don't _cry_ , or I'm just gonna start, and you know how that goes."

Danny laughs and nods. "Take care, Nana. Hopefully we'll see you soon."

"You'd better," she replies, moving on to hug Catherine and finish up with her goodbyes. 

Danny watches the proceedings, shoving his hands into his pockets for lack of something better to do with them. There are final waves goodbye, and then Danny's family is gone and it's just the four of them again. 

As Danny walks hand-in-hand with Grace back toward Steve's truck, Steve and Catherine behind them, he thinks about how this feels almost the same as the week before, yet vastly different. 

He thinks about telling Grace that things have changed, but the last thing he wants to do is jinx this relationship before it even really starts. Danny decides to tell her the next time he has Grace. Squeezing her hand, Danny asks his daughter, "You have everything you need from my place for going to your Mom and Pop's? All your homework?"

Grace gives Danny a side-eyed look and says, "Danno, I haven't been to your apartment since we moved in. I did get everything from Steve's house, though."

Danny realizes that, except to check on his Dad and grab a change of clothes, Danny hasn't been back to his apartment all week either. He's a little disturbed by how okay he is with that fact. 

Now that the week is over, and Danny's relatives are on their way back to Jersey, Danny could go home. He ponders that possibility and quickly puts it firmly out of his mind. He's itching to get his hands on both Catherine and Steve, if they'll still have him. The look Steve gives Danny when he glances over his shoulder makes Danny's blood rush in his ears and he has to bite his lip brutally so he doesn't get hard. That seems like a good indication that Steve at least is on the same page as Danny.

When they drop Grace off at Rachel and Stan's, Danny walks her to the door. Rachel greets them, her eyes following Grace as she runs back into the house. Turning back to Danny, Rachel asks, "How is your family, Daniel?"

"Good," Danny replies, wondering a little bit whether Rachel is asking because she remembers the Williams clan fondly, or if she's just being polite. "You know, same as always." He points past Rachel into the house and asks, "How was meeting Andrea's family?"

"Awful," Rachel says with a grimace. "They did _not_ like the fact that we're divorced and remarried."

Danny can't help it. He grins. "Really?"

"Oh, wipe the smirk off your face, Daniel." Rachel chuckles to show she's not actually mad. She looks past Danny at Steve's truck in the driveway. "So, how long has this been going on?"

Looking back at where Steve and Catherine are talking together in the truck, Danny can't help but smile. "Awhile," he tells Rachel, his eyes still on them. 

Rachel gives Danny a long look, her lips smiling, but her eyes sad. "I hope it works out well for you."

Danny nods, accepting how hard it probably was for Rachel to wish him well, after everything they'd been through. "Thank you. Good luck with the in-laws."

Rachel laughs. "Thank you." She ducks her head, and says, "Goodbye, Daniel."

"Bye," Danny says, leaving before she can close the door in his face. This time it's Danny who's got the shiny new relationship, and he's not going to waste the opportunity to rub that in Rachel's face, just a little.

He jumps up into the truck, buckling his belt and then throwing his arm over Catherine's shoulders. "So," he says to them, raising his brows.

"So," Catherine replies, one of her brows arched, a smile playing at her lips. "Home?" She turns to face Steve.

Steve grins, his smile brilliant as he nods. "Yeah, home. Let's go."

~*~

Danny knows his relationship with Stan was never all that healthy. He only married the guy in the first place because Rachel loved him, and Rachel was pregnant, and Danny didn't want to be the guy who was a father out of wedlock. Stan offered support and stability, and he loved Rachel, and he adored Grace. He just didn't...he didn't love Danny. 

Stan didn't love Danny, and Danny knew it. Maybe he did start spending more time at work than he absolutely had to. Maybe they did tend to focus on Rachel when the three of them were together. Danny's pretty sure he could count on his fingers the number of times in six years of marriage that he and Stan actually fucked. 

So, it was not a healthy relationship. It was the kind of relationship that had been on life support since the beginning. 

So if Danny's relationship with Stan had always been half-dead, his relationship with Steve appears to be developing in the exact opposite direction. Whenever Steve touches Danny, he feels electrifyingly alive. Danny's skin tingles as Steve traces over it with his fingertips. Steve's kiss makes Danny ache for more, right down to his bones. The way Steve whispers Danny's name made Danny's heart fill to bursting with joy. 

Danny's relationship with Catherine isn't quite as deep yet, but Danny knows this fondness he feels for her will easily turn to love the more time they spend together. 

They bring Danny right back up to the bedroom they left together that morning, Catherine pulling Danny by the hand and Steve crowding behind him, all hands and kisses. As soon as they're in the bedroom, Catherine starts to strip and Steve unbuttons Danny's shirt, his fingers fumbling as he sucks a mark on the back of Danny's neck.

As Steve pulls Danny's now-open shirt off of him and Catherine, in her underwear, moves back in for another kiss, Danny's insecurities get the best of him. He puts his hands on Catherine's shoulders and says, "Wait."

"What?" she asks, her eyes going over Danny's to meet Steve's. "What's wrong?"

Danny moves his hands from Catherine's shoulder to her hand, turning to reach for Steve's hand as well. Steve asks, "Danny?"

Danny squeezes both their hands, but he can't quite look at them as he says, "Okay. Here's the thing." Danny pauses long enough to sigh as he works up the nerve. "If I'm in this?" He meets Steve's eye first. "If I'm in this, I'm all in, alright? I cannot do casual with either of you." Danny switches his gaze to Catherine. "I needed you to know that before we do this."

Catherine smiles, looking down as she nods. "Y-yeah. I'm in." She turns her attention toward Steve, so Danny does as well.

Steve looks back and forth between Catherine and Danny for a moment before reaching over and taking Catherine's free hand in his. He nods and clears his throat. "Yeah, Danny. I'm in, too." His smile is hesitant at first until he sees Danny's face and the huge grin Danny's giving him. Steve laughs, pulling both Catherine and Danny closer and hugging them tightly. "So, can we finish getting naked now?"

Danny snorts, addressing Catherine as he says, "I tell you, this guy and his one-track mind."

"Well, right now," Steve says, lifting Danny's tank-top over his head while Catherine unbuckles Danny's pants, "my one-track mind is focused on how bad I want to fuck you."

The low growl in Steve's voice makes Danny's knees weak, and his cock twitch in his boxers. "Shit, yeah."

Danny kisses Steve, and then starts attacking Steve's clothes, pushing and tugging them off with Catherine's help. The three of them fall onto the bed, where Danny ends up on his back. Catherine lays half on top of Danny, her leg hiked up over his thigh, while Steve ends up practically on top of both of them. 

Chuckling, Steve shifts to the side and says, "Sorry. I haven't had a third in bed for a long time. I've gotta remember how this goes."

Danny vaguely gestures down toward his crotch, and says, "It's just like riding a bike, Steven. You never really forget how to do it."

Steve glares, which makes Catherine giggle and lean over to kiss Steve. Steve kisses her back, and Danny groans, "Well, there's a sight I could get used to."

Steve smirks and then pushes his mouth against Danny's neck, biting and sucking as he squeezes his hot, dry hand tight around Danny's cock. 

"Ooh, and there's a sight _I_ could get used to," says Catherine, running her hand over Danny's chest and rubbing one of his nipples with her thumb.

Danny reaches out for them the best he can, one hand on the back of Steve's neck, holding him close. He uses the other hand to caress down Catherine's back and ass cheeks. Catherine shudders, pressing her crotch against Danny's thigh, her hand dipping down to scratch at the hair around the base of Danny's cock. 

"Fuck," Danny whispers, pinned down under the two of them, at their mercy. Steve moves his hand too slowly, and Catherine traces fingers gently around the base of Danny's cock. "Fuck, I need..."

"Yeah, we got you," Steve says, but then he rolls away, the bastard. 

Danny doesn't have time to complain before Catherine pulls Danny onto her, fitting his hips between her thighs and enticing him into a hungry kiss. "Oh, God, Cath," he says against her skin, rutting into the crease of her hip. 

The bed dips between Danny's knees and Steve gets his arm around Danny's shoulders, pulling him up until his back is flush with Steve's chest.

"Steve," Danny groans, laying his head back against Steve's shoulder. "You better not have been joking when you said you wanted to fuck me."

"I wasn't joking," Steve assures him, nipping at the side of Danny's neck and tracing the fingers of his free hand down the cleft of Danny's ass. "Cath? Did you think I was joking?"

Laying back against the pillows, her knees spread and her eyes dark, Catherine shakes her head. "No, I never thought you were joking. Now, if somebody doesn't touch me soon..."

Steve murmurs into Danny's ear, "I want to see you go down on her."

Danny shivers and meets Catherine's eye. "Do you–"

"God, _yes_ ," she says, groaning at the suggestion. 

As soon as Steve loosens his hold on Danny, he dives right in, kissing Catherine's mouth, and then trailing kisses down her body. Catherine throws her head back, and when he gets to her already-soaked pussy and licks tentatively, she groans again, loudly. 

"Fuck," Steve murmurs, his hands hot on Danny's back, and hips, and butt. Danny tries not to let Steve distract him as he licks Catherine again, pressing his tongue harder against her inner labia and clit. "Is he doing it right, Cath?" Steve asks, and Danny has half a second to be offended that Steve would think so poorly of Danny's skills, before Steve's wet thumb swipes over Danny's asshole.

"Oh, yeah," Catherine replies, breathless. She squirms as Danny dips his tongue into her entrance and then moves upward quickly to suck on her clit. Catherine puts a hand on Danny's head. "Oh, fuck! Steve, he's better at this than you are."

Danny laughs, pulling back to wipe off his face with one hand. "Did you hear that, St–" Danny tries to say, but then he's Steve's finger fucking into him with shallow little thrusts and Danny's voice gives out on him. "Guh."

"Wow, speechless," Steve says with a chuckle.

Catherine just whines and nudges Danny with her heel until he puts his mouth back on her. Danny feels himself opening up much faster for Steve than he ever did for Stan, and Danny knows that's a consequence both of Danny having been so on edge all day – all _week_ – without relief, and of Steve's superior skill in the matter. 

Danny's got Catherine writhing on the sheets almost as much as he is, when he realizes Steve's zeroed in on his prostate with two fingers and isn't letting up. Danny gasps for air and cries out, "Steve! Stop or I'm gonna..."

Steve slows down, but he doesn't stop, grinning at Danny when Danny glares at him over his shoulder. 

"Condoms," Catherine demands, drawing Danny's attention back toward her. "Steve, c'mon!"

Steve groans and pulls his fingers out of Danny, making Danny shiver and meet Catherine's eyes. Catherine gets up on her knees, meeting Danny halfway and pulling him into a deep kiss. Danny can't get enough of her. He runs his hands up her arms, into her hair, down her chest. He holds onto her hips, pulling her close, and then gets his hands on her ass. "Cath."

"Been wanting you so much," Catherine says, her hands cupping Danny's face. 

God, it's too much, and Danny can't meet her eyes, for fear of losing it if he does, so he closes them and kisses Catherine again. The edge of the bed dips and then Steve's got his hands back on Danny's hips. Steve's condom-sticky cock brushes against Danny's ass as Steve reaches around Danny and pulls a condom onto Danny's cock. The cool, wet latex surrounds Danny and he has to pull his right hand away from Catherine's hip to squeeze hard at the base of his cock so he doesn't come just yet. "Fuck," Danny hisses, dropping his head forward against Catherine's shoulder. "Holy shit. Okay. Okay, how do you want to do this?"

"You're the one in the middle today," Catherine replies. "How do _you_ want it?"

"Hard," Danny replies, his mouth going before he actually thinks about his answer. He kisses Catherine and then reaches back to address Steve. "Hard and fast. Just for right now. I can't wait. I–"

Steve cuts off Danny with a brutal kiss. Then he says decisively, "Cath, on your back, so we can see you. Pillow under your hips."

"Yeah," she replies, sitting down and spreading her legs again. She gets the pillow situated, and then reaches forward. "Danny. C'mere."

Danny falls into Catherine's arms, kissing her and rutting against her until his cock catches on her entrance and he can push his way in. "Shit."

"Yeah," Catherine replies, breathlessly as Danny pushes up on his arms to get better leverage. "God, Danny. You feel so good."

Before Danny can pull out any to thrust again, Steve puts a hand on Danny's lower back. He nudges at Danny's knees until they're spread and then he's got his hands hot and heavy on both of Danny's ass cheeks, pulling them apart. "Hard and fast, you said?"

Danny looks back over his shoulder and sees Steve's eyes dark with determination and lust. It makes Danny shiver, and his cock twitch, which in turn draws a small noise out of Catherine. Licking his lips, Danny says over his shoulder, "Yeah, that's what I said. So either get with the program and get in me, McGarrett, or wait your fucking turn."

Catherine gives a small huff of laughter, her hips twitching like she's as eager to get going as Danny. Steve smirks, and suddenly Danny gets the distinct impression that he's going to pay for challenging Steve like that. As Steve presses his cock into Danny, slowly but surely and so damn thick Danny's sure he's losing his mind, Danny knows he was right. "Oh, fuck. Fuck _fuckfuckfuck_."

"Don't hurt him," Catherine says.

Before Steve can respond, Danny groans and says, "Oh, god. Not hurt. Not at all…"

Steve bottoms out and drops his chest against Danny's back, kissing Danny's shoulder. Murmuring softly, his fingers flexing in their hold on Danny's hips, Steve asks, "Still okay with hard and fast?"

"Yes, god dammit," Danny cries, bucking against Steve so he has enough space to rock into Catherine.

"Oh, shit," Catherine says, grinding her hips against Danny. "Oh, god. Do that again."

This time, before Danny can comply with Catherine's demand, Steve pulls out of Danny and slams them both forward. Steve's cock glances along Danny's prostate, and Danny's cock slips into the heat of Catherine's pussy, and the combination of the two sensations has Danny screwing his eyes shut, clenching his teeth, and groaning through it. 

"God, Danny," Steve says, thrusting again, and then again.

Danny tries to keep up with the pace Steve sets, for Catherine's sake, but the richness of sensation is overwhelming. More to distract himself than anything else, Danny drops down far enough to suck at the skin on Catherine's neck. She's got one hand clenching Danny's bicep, and the other down between them, getting herself off.

"H-how you doing?" Danny asks her, unable to catch his breath, because Steve is seriously like a freight engine or something, and Danny knows he can't keep going much longer. That doesn't quite mean he wants it to stop, though.

Instead of answering, Catherine gives a sharp cry, arching her back, so all Danny can see is the bottom of her chin. Her nails dig into Danny's arm, and her pussy tugs him at a different angle and clenches, and Steve hits Danny's prostate dead-on, and that's all it takes. Danny sees stars as he comes. He clenches down around Steve's cock and buries himself in Catherine as far as he can and comes, and comes, and comes.

Danny's vaguely aware of Steve calling out as well, hips going still as he pitches forward, sliding his arms around Danny's chest and pressing his forehead to Danny's shoulder. "Oh, god, Danno."

"Yeah," Danny agrees with a groan, his arms shaking as he tries to keep his and Steve's weight from crushing Catherine. A second later, he thinks _the hell with it_ and lets his left arm collapse as he pushes off with his right. Danny reaches down just in time to make sure the condom stays on as he pulls out, and then he lands next to Catherine. Steve ends up bouncing on the mattress at Danny's back when Danny makes him fall. 

Danny should probably clean up or something, but right now all he can do is turn onto his back between Catherine and Steve and breathe. Certain parts of him feel tight, like they're going to ache once the endorphins fade away, but for now, Danny rides the high of feeling good. 

Catherine hums and lifts Danny's arm until she's pressed up against his side, her head on his shoulder, and Danny's arm under her neck and around her back. "I'm glad you came back home with us, Danny," she says, her curled hand resting just above his heart. 

"Yeah, me too," Danny says, holding Catherine closer as they watch Steve take off both condoms (Danny almost, but not quite, gets hard again at the pleasant sensation) and drop them into the trash can in the corner. 

Steve rejoins them, cuddling close and putting his head on Danny's unoccupied shoulder. His hand covers Catherine's on Danny's chest, and he says, "Thanks for choosing us."

"What are you talking about?" Danny asked with a smirk. "Like I had any other choices lined up?" He shakes his head and reaches over to kiss Steve. "Not that I'm not happy with how things have turned out, mind you."

"It was just supposed to be pretend," Catherine says, pressing her chin into Danny's shoulder. "Over once your family left. You could've changed your mind."

Danny laughs. "No I couldn't. Who gets presented with a chance at this," he kisses Catherine, "and this," he kisses Steve, "and _changes their mind_?"

Catherine and Steve share a look until Steve clears his throat and says, "Plenty of people, Danno. Several over the years."

Danny frowns and hugs both of them closer. "Well, those people were idiots."

Laughing happily, Steve shifts further onto Danny, squashing him, really, and hugs Danny and Catherine close. "Yeah, they really were."

When Steve moves his weight back onto the mattress instead of on Danny, Catherine says, "As soon as my legs work again, I'm going to raid the leftovers from last night and _then_ it's time for round two!" She grins.

"Round two?" Danny asks, turning as Steve pushes him onto his side and spoons up behind him. "How many rounds are there?"

Catherine laughs and turns away from Danny, playing the little spoon for him and pulling his arm over her waist. 

Steve mutters into Danny's ear, "You don't want to know."

Chuckling, Danny settles back against Steve and drags Catherine closer. He lets his eyes slip shut and thinks that he definitely wouldn't mind waking up like this every morning. He's got Steve's breath tickling his ear and Catherine's hair in his face, and he's probably going to overheat eventually, but right now, this is just where he wants to be. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I'd love any kudos and/or comments you'd be willing to leave.
> 
> Again, please be sure to visit Narya's [art masterpost](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4997188) and let her know what you thought of the art!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Art Masterpost: Sometimes a lie is the best thing](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4997188) by [Narya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Narya/pseuds/Narya)




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